After spending five months working with the United Nations at Macau, I was feeling lucky to be an Indian. The reason was the strong moral ethos associated with India. But news reports like this make me wonder whether our moral ethos, assuming that they still exist, are changing for the worse.
I am unaware of the new definitions of love and relationship. It seems that I have not grown with time, at least not at the pace at which people mentioned in the aforesaid article have. But whatever be the case, the most important thing in love or for that matter in any relationship is responsibility. Mutual respect and care for the partner are the cornerstones of a successful relationship. But today when I look around me, I find that relationships and failures are fast becoming synonyms. From parents killing their children to teachers abusing their students, the list of breaking relationships is unending. I am no social scientist to analyze the reasons for failing relationships. However, this particular case forces me to search for possible reasons from a common man's point of view. What could be the reasons that lead people to engage in swinging( partner swapping)?
Reason 1 : Unsatisfied with partner
The most common reason given by swingers. Well, this issue could be resolved by mutual understanding or by taking professional help. If your partner cannot satisfy you what is the guarantee that some one else's can?
Reason 2 : Just to spice up life
The most ardent fan of Baba Ramdev will tell you that spices are bad for health. Jokes apart, spicing can be done with other ingredients too. A cool vacation with your partner or anything that makes both of you are comfortable may work wonders. But swinging for fun??? Beyond my comprehension.
Reason 3: Status Symbol
Well, what status are you talking about. If you feel that indulging in swinging enhances your status then you are fooling yourself. Helping a poor child to get into school, for instance, is a far better way of enhancing your status. Of course, this is my definition of status and I presume that its obsolete now.
Reason 4 : Its my wish..what has society to do with it
My dear, you are free to follow your chosen path. In fact you are doing a great job for the society by increasing the tax collected from psychologists.
In my assessment, this is a desperate step taken by unsecured people who feel a hollowness in their existence. And to fill this hollowness they select mud instead of concrete. The article also mentions that swinging is class specific and limited to the rich and the upper-middle class. This observation, assuming it is true, clearly indicates that morality and education are not necessarily related. Such a thing is unheard of in poor communities, as honour is the only prized possession of the poor. Here, I must make myself very clear that my observation is with respect to a few people and not any class in general.
Finally I would like to focus on the results that the swingers get. Are they satisfied? Does their life gets spiced up? Does it give them the much sought after status? Even if it does...at what cost? I shudder to think about the permanent effect of this on their children and near and dear ones and most importantly, on their relationship.
